Yesterday, Justin Bieber did a thing worse than he's ever done before. No, he didn't eat his roommates leftover Thai food. No, he didn't pay with a ten, get back change for a twenty, and not say anything. No, he didn't put out a hit on an important United States congressman. It was FAR worse. Yesterday, Justin Bieber wore a really stupid outfit.
Hey Justin, I like your hat. Did Lakiutu drop it on you from his cloud in Level 4-1?
Yes, having chosen the most ludicrous of outfits, Justin Bieber set foot in the world yesterday like nothing was wrong. And the internet JUMPED on it. Reddit took out it's knives while LOST's writer Damon Lindelof spent nine hours tweeting about it. And maybe they should have! I mean, have you seen the PANTS? Look at his stupid PANTS!
It looks like you killed a leopard from Narnia you sick f*ck.
Usually I'd feel weird about attacking someone's fashion choices like this. I mean, we should all be true to ourselves, right? We should follow our bliss and put whatever makes us feel comfortable and confident on our bodies.
But this outfit is coming purely from Bieber's id -- the part of his brain that is pure animal, that just wants to eat and bang and attack those it perceives as a threat. That's not to say that the id is all bad. It has some good qualities.
Without the id, we'd never eat ANY candy.
The point is, a healthy person balances the id with the ego, the part of the brain that assesses reality. Since reality SO CLEARLY tells us these clothes make Bieber look like an idiot, it's fair to say that Justin Bieber's MIND is not being built effectively. And when we stop and think about it, of course his mind isn't being built effectively!
Justin Bieber has been around so many managers and agents who don't say "no" to him that he's unable to tell the difference between what's a good idea in his mind and what's a good idea in reality. And someone needs to teach him that difference before it's too late.
"What? I thought it'd be dope to kill a dude!"
What would you wear if you were a teen billionaire? Let me know on twitter @mikeyfromsu or in the comments below!
Check out What's In Bieber's Basement!?