I don't know about the rest of you, but I spend most of my days trying to figure out how to make lots and lots of money while doing no work. Some of my get-rich-quick schemes have included making an iPhone app for the blind, renting out jetpacks to the elderly, and taking all the napkins at Starbucks and selling them to customers at a markup. But get-rich-quick schemes work best when they're simple, and nothing is simpler than charging people for something they were going to do anyway. Like sleeping.
That said, the jetpacks thing is a great idea as long as I can find some free jetpacks.
But Jackie Samuels got there before I did. She runs a cuddling business from her home in Rochester, New York. Tired, lonely people — mostly men, but some women — pay her 60 dollars an hour to snuggle up tight and take a nap with her. It seems intimate, sure, but Samuels makes sure there is ABSOLUTELY NO SEXUAL TOUCHING WHATSOEVER.
It's all the emotional connection without any of that boring relationship!
Originally starting the business to support her education and young son, Samuels offers a service that not many others can — a moment of warmth and solace in our increasingly cold and isolated world. Apparently customers can nap wherever they want around her home, but Samuels says most choose her bed even though, again, there is ABSOLUTELY NO SEXUAL TOUCHING WHATSOEVER.
Her only satisfied clients are coma patients and men without penises.
I get that it can be lonely when you're out of a relationship, but this, like many other get-rich-quick schemes, falls apart when you think about it for just a minute. Is there much of a difference between Jackie Samuels and a sack of flour in pajamas? How about one of those big stuffed Plutos you get at Disneyland? You can snuggle with those things for free. And if it's really the human connection you're looking for, you can ALWAYS go snuggle with a homeless people.
And they won't cost you any more than a ham sandwich and your sense of safety.
Would you pay 60 dollars for a nap with a lady? What if there was ABSOLUTELY NO SEXUAL TOUCHING WHATSOEVER? Let me know on twitter @mikeyfromsu or in the comments below!
Check out 20 People Sleeping Where They Should Not Be Sleeping!