I’m not a patient man. This probably stems from the fact that nothing in this life is actually so good it’s worth waiting for, but I digress. We all spend a lot of time waiting for things, and we almost always do it in an at least mildly orderly line (excluding some countries in Asia, sorry guys!) But waiting in line comes with its own trial and ordeals. Which ones, you ask? Well thanks for asking because that’s the perfect segue into this list of the 7 Worst People To Wait Behind In Line::
The Guy Who Just Discovered He Was In Line, Apparently
Oh, are you totally unprepared to order? That's weird, because we've been standing here waiting to get to the front of the line for about five minutes, and I could have sworn you were conscious the entire time. Well, at least you’re going to take as much time as everyone else cumulatively did in front of you.
A Parent With Small Children
After a long day of running completely banal errands while having to cart their kids around, watching a parent interact with their still-somehow-unruly children is like watching a very tired dictator try to crush a very disorganized rebellion. And it’s not fun waiting behind an ongoing civil war.
An Employee on Their Day Off
For someone who hates their job so much, it is odd that you decide to show up on your day off and grind service to a halt by hanging around and having a conversation with your co-workers about what a jerk one of the other employees, who’s also not working that day, is. Funny thing about THAT employee though, is that they don’t hang around work when they don’t have to because they don’t have any real friends.
Person Who Won’t Get Off Their Phone
Hey, a human being is talking to you, so maybe give them the dignity of letting them have the required seven seconds of your attention required to order your stupid coffee. This person is also horrible, because it usually results in you feeling empathy for someone, which is the worst.
Mister/Miss Moneybags
Really glad I got to listen to you order the most extravagant item on the menu, while I’m standing here making sure I have enough change for something off the dollar menu. Really improving my outlook on life.
The Insincere Thanker
Listen, having the words "thank you" come out of your mouth doesn’t automatically make you seem like not a hot sack of garbage, especially when those words are all one together at once like "ohmygodthankyousomuch". We demand sincerity, damn it!
No One
Oh man, I cannot handle having an employee ask to help me before I’m ready to be helped. I like a nice buffer of at least one other customer to give me a bit of time to gather my bearings. I know you’re worried about a secret shopper visit, but I just walked in the door, give me a minute to prep myself!
My Face is on fire. Let us know in the comments!
