Typically when you think of school shootings and what music the shooters listen to you think of Death Metal. Aggressive, angry, bleak, fast music that pumps them up for a killing spree. This, of course, is a stereotype, there are plenty of death metal kids who aren't school shooters at all, it's important not to go by stereotypes. However, it is true that everyone who listens to death metal is a virgin, and that when they walk by a crucifix the crucifix melts.
They're just like you and me, except that they will always be virgins.
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But not all school shootings involve death metal. Some involve an even more ominous kind of music:
Yeah Fresh Prince, we are looking at you.
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Yes, the Washington Post is reporting that all of the schools in Pennsylvania County were put on lock down when a receptionist called a student, got his voice mail, and misunderstood the lyric, "shooting some b-ball outside of the school," to be, "shooting some people outside of the school."
Calm down Will, I don't like jocks either but this isn't the way to solve your problems!
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If the woman had just taken a moment, instead of overreacting, she would have heard the whole song and known that the boy's plan was to shoot up the school, move to Bel Air, California with his aunt and uncle, shoot up everyone there, and crown himself prince, enslaving any and all of those who survive.
He will not rest until we are all his slaves.
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How do you plan to resist the Fresh Prince's tyrannical rule? Let us know in the comments below!
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