Holiday Specials are a staple of television. They've been around pretty much forever. A lot of shows are a little too uppity and think that they're too good for a Holiday Special. They need to get off their high horse and give the people what they want. I personally don't think any show should be allowed on the air unless it has a Holiday Special planned. Here are Holiday Specials that I want to see.
The Walking Dead
It would be nice to see everyone on this show have fun for once. There are tons of empty malls just filled with stuff. There has got to be one with a zombie Santa and some undead elves. That Santa's belly is shaking, but not like a bowl full of jelly. It's more like a bowel full of smelly. It would be especially cool because they could make a bunch of references to the mall from Dawn Of The Dead complete with murderous bikers and an escape by helicopter at the end of the episode.
Homeland
Christmas is one of the busiest travel times of the year and Homeland is a show about Homeland Security. It makes so much sense. They could have some terrorists high jack a plane. Just when you think they're going to crash it, Santa Claus shows up in his sled to save the day. After that, of course they would keep Santa on for the rest of the series as a key member of their team. Some people might think this breaks the reality of the show, but I just think those people don't believe hard enough.
Breaking Bad
Walter White is getting way too greedy. I think he needs to get a little bit of the Christmas spirit in him. Instead of trying to profit off of his blue meth, he should make candy cane striped meth and go out in the streets wearing a Santa hat to give it away. I'm sure it would end up with some big shoot out or explosion where a bunch of innocent people get killed. At least, it would be nice for a little while.
Eastbound and Down
Eastbound And Down has put Kenny Powers in just about every bad situation you could possibly think of. Just when you think he can't get any lower, he goes steals his dead friend's truck. I think the only place left for him to go is to work as a mall Santa. He's pretty much always broke so it seems like a good fit that he would play a trash talking Santa Claus with Stevie as his helper elf.
Game Of Thrones
Game Of Thrones is so serious all the time. I'd like to see everyone lighten up for a little bit. Tyrion could dress up like an elf and give out presents, the Starks could go snowboarding North of the wall, and Joffrey could decorate a tree with severed heads. I mostly just want to see Santa's sleigh pulled by white walkers. Those are presents that you probably don't want to open. (They're just more severed heads.)
Louie
Louie already did a Halloween episode. Why not do a Christmas episode? It could be about how sad Christmas is without his kids or maybe about how he goes out with a woman and then it turns out she has a Santa Claus fetish. Either way, I'm sure things would get super awkward since that's pretty much how every episode turns out.
Dexter
It's pretty creepy that Santa Claus comes in to your house while you sleep. Luckily, the real Santa just leaves presents and then leaves. I don't think a Santa on Dexter would be so jolly. He'd probably be a lot more like the ax murdering Santa from Silent Night, Deadly Night or Bill Goldberg from Santa's Slay. It'd be fun to see Dexter stalking different mall Santas to figure out which one is the real killer. Hint: It's the one with the perfectly clean Santa suit. Do you know how expensive it is to get something dry cleaned every day? Most of those Santa suits are super gross with filth.
Lord Of The Rings
The Star Wars Holiday Special is considered to be one of the most blatant cash grabs in the history of holiday specials. They're turning the one Hobbit book in to three movies so they definitely are looking to cash in on the franchise. I would love it if they made a Lord Of The Rings Holiday Special. We always see a little bit of The Shire in these movies. I want to spend a whole adventure there. They can make up some dumb Hobbit Holiday that is pretty much Christmas. Then, someone bad shows up, does something evil, and finally learns a lesson about being good. Give me what I want! It's my Christmas and I'll cry if I want to.
What TV show do you want to see do a Holiday Special? Let me know on twitter @zachlunch or in the comments below!
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