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Las Vegas Student to MARRY Twilight Cardboard Cutout

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At the University of Nevada, Las Vegas, a student named Lauren Adkins is about to be made an honest woman. She has an engagement ring, a cake, and a planned ceremony all in celebration of her upcoming commitment to, well, an Edward Cullen cardboard cutout.

And that is weird. That is a weird thing to do. It's so weird that it's making ME weird. Like, I can NOT stop thinking about their sex life, even knowing that those thoughts are weird.


marrying cardboard
I'm not even aroused. I'm just FASCINATED.
(source)

I mean, I understand this conceptually. Adkins loves Twilight, and the logical extension of love is to get married. Haven't you ever used marriage to hyperbolically declare your love for something in pop culture? "I love this (burrito/ video game/ TV show) so much I'm going to marry it." Ultimately, I have to thank Chipotle burritos, the first Bioshock, and the second season of Community for not calling my bluff.


community dvd
"I think you still love me, but we can’t escape the fact that I’m not enough
for you," the second season of Community told me as I left, fighting back tears.

Thankfully, Adkins isn't really in love with her cardboard Cullen. The marriage is an art project, working to point out the falsity of not only Twilight but also Las Vegas itself. The idea is that there's a lie at their cores, with Twilight telling us that we must seek a perfect man — a man who does not and could not exist — and Las Vegas telling us we must seek easily-attained wealth.


winning in las vegas
PICTURED: The only way to be happy.
(source)

This project has made me wonder — is marrying a cardboard cutout really THAT different than crying through a YouTube video about Kristen Stewart cheating? Or getting a tattoo? Or beating up non-Twilight fans? Maybe the value of this project will be in leading other Twilight fans to question their own level of obsession. This sort of self-reflexive questioning may, of course, be easier for some than others.


crazy twilight room
This woman literally survives by eating a New Moon poster every three days.
(source)

What pop culture merchandise are you going to marry? Let me know on twitter @mikeyfromsu or in the comments below!

 


Check out 7 Hints Robert Pattinson Hates Twilight!

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