Felix Baumgartner Jumps From Space, Breaks YouTube Record

I almost never jump from outer space, reaching speeds of up to and beyond 700 miles per hour on my descent to Earth. I try to avoid it if I can. Sometimes it's unavoidable, like if I'm late for a meeting, and I happen to stuck on the border between Earth's atmosphere and space, but mostly I can get by without doing it. Felix Baumgartner however just did it. And he did it for the most badass reason of all: for the sheer f*ck of it.

Pictured above: Felix Baumgartner taking some time off to just relax.
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Yes, Mashable reports that Felix's jump from outer-f*cking-space broke a number of jumping and/or falling related records including: highest jump from a platform (128,100 feet), the longest distance freefall (119,846 feet) and maximum vertical velocity (833.9 mph or Mach 1.24). He the first human being that wasn't inside a jet or a mech warrior to break the sound barrier with the sheer weight of his own body.

Here's someone in a jet breaking the sound barrier. Or, as Felix likes to call him: a giant p*ssy.
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But Felix didn't just break the sound barrier. Or tons of shocking freefall records. He also broke the most important record of all: concurrent Youtube livestream views. 8 million people simultaneously watched him. To be fair though, many of those people quickly got distracted by their simultaneous reddit browser window when they saw someone had made a subreddit about penguins wearing fezzes.

D'aaawwww. Reddit! D'aaawwww!
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You know how it's scary to fall for like 8 seconds straight down? Imagine falling for over 4. straight. minutes. Remember how it's scary to jump from the really diving board? Imagine falling from outer.space. Here's what I'm saying. I don't care whether you're a man, a woman, old, or infirmed. We all owe Felix Baumgartner a date.

BONUS! Some helmet cam footage from Austrian TV:

What do you plan to do with your fame after you fall 180,000 feet straight down? Let us know in the comments below!