Babies crying, nails on a chalkboard, car alarms – some sounds make you feel like daggers are being shoved into your ears. Annoying noises aren’t the only aural offenders out there, though. Sometimes the mere use of a word is enough to drive you insane. Every time I hear someone say one of the words on this list, I want to set a hospital on fire.
Whatever
“Clueless,” a.k.a. the most popular (and dated) film of 1995, can be blamed for shoving this infuriatingly dismissive catchphrase into the lexicon. For almost two decades since, an entire generation of vapid Cher Horowitz-wannabees have put their well manicured hands together to form a “W” and their well glossed lips together to express disgust whenever anyone says anything they disagree with.
Irregardless
Straight up, ladies and gentlemen, irregardless IS NOT A DAMN WORD. Even though it has an impressive four syllables, you are not smart for using it because it IS NOT A DAMN WORD. The fact that my computer recognizes it as such makes me think my computer’s a moron.
Yummy
Watching a grown-ass woman describe something as “yummy” is just as disconcerting as watching a 8-month-old perform open heart surgery. Given their ages, neither should be doing what they’re doing. Which is why it’s deeply, deeply disturbing.
My bad
OK, so this is technically two words, but still. “My bad” is the most non-committal phrase of all time, which is why it’s also the most infuriating. Saying “my bad” is the equivalent of saying “I acknowledge guilt, yet am too much of a jerkoff to apologize.” I will slap you upside the face for saying “my bad” – but I’ll apologize afterward, because I’m A GOOD PERSON.
Eew
When it comes to terrible words, “eew” pretty much has it all. Not only does it sound gross, but it makes the face of the person saying it look gross. Just imagine Jess, the mean cheerleader from chemistry class, saying it to a nerd who just asked her out. Disgusting, right? God, Jess sucks. I can’t wait for her to get pregnant...then we’ll see who’s so smug...
Literally
Everyone literally uses the word “literally” wrong. Listen, dude – I know you didn’t literally crap your pants when Sara told you she was dating Justin. If you had literally crapped your pants, you’d probably (literally) still be getting crap out of your pants.
Like
Like? It’s, like, the least articulate thing you could say. You, like, agree, right? ‘Cause if you don’t, like, agree, like, I don’t know what to tell you. And even if you do, like, agree, I still don’t know what to tell you. ‘Cause, like, as I stated earlier, I’m, like, super inarticulate.
Rockstar
If you are not a rockstar, you are not a rockstar. It doesn’t matter how many energy drinks you pound, or how many stupid tattoos you get, or how much gel you put in your hair. The only people who can “party like rockstars” are rockstars. If you are not a rockstar, you cannot party like one. Capisce, dumbass?
What other words make you want to punch a hole in the wall every time you hear ‘em? Let me know in the comments!
